After a relationship ends, you may find yourself experiencing an array of emotions. Your friends and family may be urging you to get back into the dating world, but you don’t know if you’re ready. How soon is too soon? Professional Christian Matchmaker and Relationship Coach Renee Richel says only you will know when the time is right. The most important thing is to take your time, don’t rush into a relationship and don’t let others pressure you to start seeing other people if you’re not ready, just like you can’t force yourself to move on if you haven’t fully let go.
Richel suggests using these 4 indicators to determine if you’re ready to get back into dating:
You Put Yourself First
During the period right after a breakup, it’s easy to wallow in sorrow and feel badly about yourself. Take the time to grieve what was, but don’t get stuck in a rut. Before you can give yourself to someone else, you need to be happy with yourself. Figure out what makes you happy: what hobbies you want to engage in, who you want to spend time with, and how you envision your future. During your season of rest and rebuilding, remember to pray for your future mate every day. Richel recommends several books that will serve as a guide on how to prepare to meet your future mate, such as “When God Writes Your Love Story” and “Men Are Like Waffles and Women Are Spaghetti.” When you meet the right one, you should make each other better in order to make your world around you better, together.
Someone New Sparks Your Interest
It may take a while to start looking at people as potential partners since you were so used to having yours around. When you meet someone new that sparks your interest, you may feel guilty, unsure, or doubtful. You need to remember that your old relationship is in the past and no emotions you feel or thoughts you have are wrong. Although you don’t have to rush into a relationship with the first person you like, it’s important to give yourself a chance to see what’s out there. Be open to meeting new people and see what opportunities unfold.
You’re Done Keeping Tabs On Your Ex
A lot of times after a breakup, people make the mistake of worrying too much about what their ex-partner is doing or who they’re seeing. Just because a relationship is over doesn’t mean the feelings are gone, which is why many people still keep tabs on their ex. Nowadays, you no longer have to call or text them to learn what they’re up to; with the advancements in technology, you can get a pretty clear view into their life from social media. Decide for yourself what you need to do to stop creeping on their profile, whether you need to unfollow them, block them, or take a social media detox all together, you’ll never be able to move on if you’re constantly wondering what they’re up to.
You’ve Finally Moved On
When a breakup is fresh, you often have to remind yourself that you’re single when you wake up in the morning. Whether you were married or in a relationship, it can take a while to get used to waking up alone again. When you’re finally able to stop bursting into tears over them or letting thoughts of them cloud your mind, you’re making progress. Letting go of your ex can take anywhere from a few short weeks to a year, but only you can determine if you’ve fully moved on. If you can treasure the memories you shared with your ex, without letting the breakup negatively affect you anymore that is a sure-fire sign you’ve moved on and are ready to get back into the dating world if you desire.
If you find that you’re ready to get back into the dating world and would like help making that next meaningful connection, give us a call or fill out 1 True Match’s complimentary dating profile. See how we can help you get back in the dating world and find a partner that has the same goals, hopes, and dreams as you!