As singles adjust to the “new dating normal” we’re anticipating how meeting and dating will change. In our latest blog, I walked you through how to safely navigate this post pandemic world when it comes to getting to know a potential partner while prioritizing your health and safety. One trend we’ve already identified is that people are waiting longer to actually meet in person. So, you may be wondering how to keep that potential partner engaged and interested while taking your time to determine if it’s worth the risk to meet in person. Normally we would say texting is something you should do sparingly and for a short time before actually meeting face to face. But times are different right now and your health and safety come first.
In this edition of True Talk with Renee, I have 4 helpful tips that will help you create and keep chemistry over text until you meet in person:
1. Initiate with more than just a “hi!”
Sure, saying “hi!” to start a conversation is definitely a normal way to begin. However, you want to give them a reason to reply and with more than just a “hi” back. Ask them how their day was, let them know you’ve been thinking about them if it’s reached that level, or maybe just ask what they’ve been up to. Although it may seem simple, the entire point of texting is to engage in conversation and learn more about each other. By digging a little deeper than just “hi,” you can get a good idea of what their daily routine is like or what hobbies they enjoy or how they are doing during these difficult times.
2. Be open and ask questions.
Pretty much everyone likes to talk about themselves, so be sure to ask questions that will allow them to feel comfortable to share with you. Not only will they see you’re interested, but you’ll also find out more about them. Asking questions about their job, hobbies, past travel, their exercise routines, pets and family is a great starting point before you get into the deep stuff. Although you may feel comfortable discussing deeper matters, like future dreams or life goals, try to gauge the situation first to make sure they’re comfortable too.
3. Show them you enjoy talking to them, but you also have a life.
Although our lives may be different than before the pandemic, it’s still important to take time for yourself. Our routines have changed, you may still be working from home, or maybe you’ve been staying with friends or are spending more time alone. It’s easy to want to keep the conversation going once you’ve found a connection because you have more time to text, but that could cause the spark to wear off. Take a break from the conversation to do something productive, go for a walk, or even think about what you want for the future. I’m not saying to just disappear on someone but it’s good to let them know you have some things to do and you will touch base at a later time. People are attracted to others who have things going on that keep them connected and busy. If you need some suggestions on how to keep yourself occupied click here for my top tips.
4. If you don’t get a response, don’t overthink it! And definitely don’t go overboard.
Of course, when we first discover someone new who sparks our interest, it’s natural to want to spend more time talking and getting to know them. If you took the initiative to text first and don’t receive a response immediately, don’t overthink it because they may be busy or can’t look at their phone while working. If you don’t hear from them for a day, consider sending a follow up text but don’t bombard their phone with messages because that could make you look clingy. If they still don’t respond then move on, that is a sign that they will not be respectful of your time and feelings down the road.
I hope these tips to creating chemistry over text will help and encourage you to put yourself out there if you haven’t already. It goes without saying but I will still throw it out there, don’t text anything you wouldn’t want to read in the newspaper. It’s an old rule but we hear so many horror stories of texts or photos coming back to haunt and hurt people. If you would like our help to make that next meaningful connection, or need more relationship coaching give us a call or fill out 1 True Match’s complimentary dating profile. See how we can help you get back in the dating world and find a partner who has the same goals, hopes, and dreams as you, because everyone deserves to find their 1 True Match.
